i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
Ever got a vibrator stuck in ur hair? Is worse that getting ur hairbrush stuck.
...well that sucks.
we hooked up. but it was that weird mix of getting naked and watching Balto that made it so awesome.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
I accidentally KO'd a baby in the airport. Thought you should know.
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
You left me alone with nothing but donuts and my thoughts.
Also, there's a guy walking around the kitchen in a shark onzie, and he just asked if we've ever smoked weed with a shark before. I'm dying
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
Randomize