I'm going to shit on something weird... I can't wait
what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Ya bro it was wild. Hey, is latex digestible?
She has the perfect pussy. Looks like a paper cut with a puff of cotton candy on top.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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