Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
Have you ever seen a 300 pound pregnant lady's boob fall out of her shirt cuz she's not wearing a bra? I have.
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
he referred to my room as the tit cave...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
ur mom makes the best bacon
WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN MY HOUSE
YOU'RE HIGH AND AT THE GYM OF COURSE YOU FEEL WEIRD
My thighs feel like glass
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
There is a chick wearing some guy's shirt wrapped around her waist as a skirt... She's flashing her panties to everyone as she sings karaoke. You need to get here.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Is there evidence of another human being getting away with this/ not dying?
I can’t tell if I have feelings for him or if my vagina does.
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
Randomize
