At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
You fucking left with him didn't you?!
you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
He had in his status he loved beating off and tagged his wife. another reason facebook should be for college.
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
He said he was going to "rock my world". I wonder if he too has a false sense of confidence and accomplishment stemming from a complete lack of honesty from our own female counterparts.
I woke up in the closet and then I found my shirt in a bag of Doritos... how does that work out?
He got me a cake that said " Congratulations on the dick "
So I just stirred my shower drink with my razor.
I'm not going to ask which end you used.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
Oh and .... you'll love this: my life coach says you writing my online dating profile isn't a horrible idea.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
Sooooooo, maybe just fucked on a motorcycle.
She looked so much better when u didn't look at her and the music was too loud to hear her
Woke up with a $100 bill from the Philippines in my bra & an unopened box of sour patch kids next to me. I have some questions.
Randomize