Just saw an old lady trip and stumble. Laughed. Kept Driving. I'm going to hell.
for on dont try to tell me you love me after three weeks of talking, for two if you are going to do that stay away from the song lyrics to a very good country song that you happened to ruin by using it, and for three erase my number im fuckin your sister now
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
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There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
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I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
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