he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
I just want to make mistakes. Like stds that go away with antibiotics mistakes.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
You also thought the cure to hiccups was drowning yourself (and you were right)
I know it's just really hard to give up sex and cigs during a blizzard
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I'm doing my accounting homework with my vibrator. Guess whose numbers are balanced on the financial statement? This ladys!
Randomize
