Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
waking up outside has become so normal, the paper boy knows to set the paper next to me
Had a speaker in class today. She asked whats the first question when you see someone pregnant. I said whos the father? She was looking for "is it a boy or a girl?"
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I'm glad that even though we are states apart our whorish hearts beat as one
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Well if YOU HAVE TO KNOW, we're laying across the street from the bar on that grassy hill trying to see who's she's with at the bar.
I don’t know how to sext. What do you say? What do you don’t say?
Just start quoting WAP lyrics.
Randomize
