How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
At 4am he sent "uree asss ize anmazin"
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
Its like no one cares im drunk naked wet and ready to throw myself at some one hold on i found a solution to my problems
I love pie. Pie understands me and the spatula
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I need you to go into my room and get some pants then bring them and four band aids to Sam's apartment no questions
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I ripped my favorite bra in half last night while I was undressing in a drunken rage.
What was the rage all about?
He wouldn't stop to let me get McDonald's french fries.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
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