There is a man walking 2 goats through the city.
Bonus: only one of them was on a leash.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
Pick my eyebrow is burning. I'm sitting in the back of dolows vat and listening to jolly music and wilfgang is signing and looking food. Cute kid. Home is where I go now.
what. the. fuck.
you should probably quit with the whole "no homo" thing, especially when you are drunk, "mo homo"gives the wrong impression.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I WANT MY VAGINA TO POUND AT NICE THINGS.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
I remember you fighting a small man for the last of the pizza. Was there a midget in my house last night?
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Sorry my phone died because I decided charging my vibrator was way more important
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize