Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
your brother just told me that Guinness is the first book of the Bible...
Pretty much knew it was gonna be awful when the extra condoms she had from her ex were entirely too big for my dick
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
Well you know it's going to be an interesting night when the bathroom attendant is doing hail marrys
Instead of getting a taxi some gay black guy drove us home. He is trying to break into the taxi business
Way to promote small business.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
Though the booty shorts might give me an extra discount. Or arrested. We'll see.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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