Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
there's a strong possibility i came on your eyeliner last night bathroom sex was unplanned and rather messy sorry
I've been laying here all day wondering why my back hurt so bad and then I remembered last night.... When you pushed me through that glass table.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?