That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
WHITE RUSSIAN WEDNESDAY. TELL YOUR CO WORKERS. INVITE QND PREPARE
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorority life is like alcoholic girl scouts, plus douchebags in polos.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
I wish I could be happy with a nice Christian girl, but no, I need a hot mess who starts bar fights
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm in your room because it's a safe space. Is it ok to pee in here?
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize