She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
I think his glow in the dark Star Wars sheets, at the time, really turned me on.
He said I was the smartest girl he had ever dated, that should have been a sign from the beginning
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
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Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
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Yeah well tell that to drunk me. She seems to have no standards or gender preference.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
Whats a little naked between friends. Just don't laugh or I'll be scared for life.
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
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