Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
we bribed her with croutons and jello shots.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
It's only considered alcoholism if you're drinking from something other than a cup....right?
One lone grasshopper in the whataburger bathroom. Don't know how it got there. Scared the fuck out of me. Also puked over the side of the silverado fence. The horses looked disappointed. Animal magnetism is beautiful. You taught me well. I love you.
His birthday is on cinco de mayo and he doesn’t drink or like tacos. What a waste.
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