This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Yeah even if I got stabbed it would be worth it
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I looked so sad that Jessica gave me a bar of soap. So that's where I'm at.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
Anytime he goes down on me i automatically think of you cheering me on. Your a good friend.
Randomize
