We found him. 8 blocks away from the bars and almost at his parent's house. On the verge of tears.
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
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Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
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There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
I'm gonna play eenie meenie at the bar tonight because it's women's day and I deserve the dick
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
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