You need to take one for the team and go bang a random sample of mexicans. Cause my internets broke and I can't google mexican foreskin stats.
Side note: I think I fell asleep holding a cereal box
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
The blackout version of me left a ransom note to the sober self. Somebody needs to control that guy
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
"what's it like being a dancer turned stoner" well, i can change the netflix using my feet mid bongrip, so there's that.
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Whatever you wanna call it i just wanna get railed tonight
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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