If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
Just found a pic on my phone of you on squatting on the hood of a police car about to take a dump. Care to explain what happened last night?
Just come get me. Somewhere there's hobo that's going to want his dumpster back, and I kinda want to be gone when he discovers the vomit.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
I woke up to both of you drawing on me in sharpie, unless a glorious threesome was had the night before that is not okay.
Who says it wasn't?
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
