not only are you not the girl i fell in love with, but from the looks of it, you ate her
u know what's depressing? a picture of an owl without a graduation cap
All i learned in high school was how to sell drugs
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
I guess he was telling a totally normal story about being a lifeguard and I wouldn't stop screaming "THAT'S LUDICROUS" at random intervals.
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Did you really kidnap my goldfish last night?
Randomize