I love you!
You're insane
Fuckin crazy man! Seriously though I think if you would have me I honestly seriously think about marrying u!
Alright now lets video chat so I can xshow u my dick! Hahahaha
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
your boyfriend is drunk and yelling to the bar that he loves his cats
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Speaking of testosterone. I saw a girl with a moustache thicker than one I can grow last night...
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I want a calm night. Not one where I wake up to you topless and bloody.
The boat wouldn't start, so we brought it back to her house and we've been sitting in it in her driveway for the past 5 hours drinking beer and yelling at peoplee.
Is Oprah even human
Rebecca hasn't has this number in 3 months. Please tell all her friends to stop calling at 3 am. We are not interested in buying or selling drugs nor do we want to hook up with anyone. You all need to go to rehab.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
I'm not fucking you with a Stormtrooper helmet on!
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