Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
and I asked her"are you allergic to condoms latex like your older sister " she said "Idk this is gonna be my 1time"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
the brownie started to kick in before i finished the essay... it became a race against my own increasing intoxication
I never once brought up his unibrow when he was insulting me. That's class.
Gay TA. Finally going to boost my GPA your way.
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
He's going to find out eventually, but really what's he going to do? Cry about it and buy another fucking kitten??
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
She has an alarming number of pictures with cat ears but the sex is amazing.
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