My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
Emergency need house key where r u I just got shit o n
There is soup leaking out of my nose nothing in life has prepared me for this moment
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
He fucked me so hard my hair extensions fell out
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
Randomize
