I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
when I forget a girls name in bed I ask her her middle name then tell her i'm gonna call her that from now on
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
If, when you wake up, you're wondering why you're in the bathtub, it's because when I tried to move you, you yelled that that was cheating and tried to kick me in the face.
Fair enough.
After a roaring rendition of Jay-Z's "99 Problems but a bitch ain't one" I ended up making her cry on her birthday.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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