I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
was stoked on phone sex until he started reciting lines from star wars
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
Haha I haven't even had my interview yet and I'm already trying to fuck my way to the top. 'Merica.
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
my mom just told me I should hit it and quit apparently she does not like this new girl
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
He hit me up on Grindr and called me "bro." I just have to assume that the sex is going to be bad.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize