you sent me 45 texts saying "meow?"
did i?
my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
She got a tattoo in memory of her cat, my attratcion to her is no more.
At CVS buying just condoms. The guy behind me is buying just hotdog buns. There was a silent moment of understanding between us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Night. I'll wake u up at 6 with the unfinnished vodka bottle so be prepared young grasshoper. U have much to learn.
So ran into your ex from sophomore year last night... Apparently hes gay and a stripper now. we all got lap dances because we knew you
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I drew you a picture of Jesus holding hands with Frida Kahlo as a token of my gratitude
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
I offered to give him "road head" while he played GTA 5. I think he will be more optimistic about date night in the future.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
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