She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
Their bromance is so intense that they don't even eye-fuck when they see each other....they eye-make-love.
just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
you passed out on the bathroom floor with the door locked. we had to break in and no one was sober enough to move you so they just threw a towel on you and stepped over you
Had her hockey skates on in the house. Whole floor is ruined.
so i literally woke up after a night of doing lines to a bag of pretzels falling off my bed. a reminder that maybe this is a contributing factor to my freshman 15.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Betting for two different teams with two different guys is the best. Time to get $100 by one guy and laid by the other!
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Jesus I was next level high last night having a mental epiphany about the state of Virginia
My mom said "I saw the signs you guys were high, so I made the spaghetti"....so ya, I'd say she definitely knew
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