guy from last night has fluorescent crocs in his closet. judging by the rest of his clothes he doesn't wear them in an ironic way
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Just 30 Funny Tumblr Posts About Starbucks
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
it took me 7 solid minutes to realize "egggGSaucetingf" meant "exhausting"
I had to step in when you tried to make it rain baking powder on my sister
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
18 People Are Kind Of A**holes But Also Completely Hilarious
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
ITS THE CIIIIIIRCLE OF SLUUUUUUUTS
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!