Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Question. Was fucking Laura an entirely regrettable decision?
like...quickly.
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
That Kevin guy is something else...His penis is fucking glorious. And he has a way with words. If he lived here I'd be the conductor of the fuck caboose. I mean literally I would never want to get off that thing.
I'm just going to assume my unresponsive booty calls are just preparing for the women's march tomorrow
I thought I came here to hook up, not for a Study Abroad 101 session
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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