She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
just found my calculator watch from 6th grade. the hipster transformation is complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
I think I just wrote a poem about your penis but it was totally unintentional.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He pulled the pencil out of my leg and then we fucked. It felt sorta like pulp fiction in reverse.
I took out the emergency phone in the elevator and replaced it with a bottle of vodka. The game is simple, do a shot for the number of the floor you're going to. Best suggestion box tip ever.
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
As I was blowing him, he proceeded to tell me that his friend who I blew years ago gave me a five star review on my BJ skills. And, he agrees.
Atta girl.
I just woke up naked in a bed with your brother. WHAT THE HELL HAPPENED TO NOT LETTING EACH OTHER DO STUPID THINGS?
You fucked my brother?!
Randomize