Taljing aboutpenisrs w gerruly ska pops
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I wish everyone could suck his dick. It was an honor.
I threw a beer bottle at the bartender and pissed myself. Somehow, I didn't get kicked out.
You're telling that to the kid drinking Jack in nothing but a graduation cap
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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