You're completely useless in the revolution.
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
when i'm drunk i think im just gonna point at him and yell adultery is a sinnnn. youre going to helllll
I know now the amount of smoke it takes to set off the fire alarm....no longer worried about using the bong...not even close
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Our sex bag has now been upgraded to sex luggage, with wheels, and now features a first aid kit. Game. On.
when he put a condom on for a handjob cuz he didn't want to "blow his load in the car" i started to question my choice in guys..
Give us adventure or give us cock. Or cocktails.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
This is what we get for finishing a whole box of Franzia by ourselves
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
