your parents love me but you hate me
I tried to use my car keys to open my door
I just started a sentence with yellow.
my vagina is like the nba. its where amazing happens.
Who did Billy Mays play for?
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
Can we please stop calling your vagina the cave of wonders?
why did you let me tell everyone that you can get herpes from the ice luge and then let me do the ice luge?
Hey, it's Thrasher! From the hospital!
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
He kept sending me videos of his dogs while I was trying to masturbate. At what point does getting vagina-block apply?
Randomize
