you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
Playing hide and seek with all those cheeseburgers... Not our finest moment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
We are in Florida for 3 days. The people in charge of shit brought: a waffle maker, a cheese grater and a SEWING MACHINE
AND NO VODKA
Drunk me really does appreciate that sober me made a list of movies to watch when drunk it saves so much time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
You gotta come over now. He is eating cupcakes while they are still in the foil.
A dozen fresh-baked cookies delivered to my dorm AND I don't have chlamydia or gonorrhea... Could this night get any better??
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
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