So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
Can i have the words "she went crazy and never came back" written on my grave?
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
Are you drunk already?
Not already - at LAST.
Randomize
