College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So the bartender from Applebees totally looks like he would take his clothes off for $40
I like how you possess the gift that turns normal guys into strippers
I'm going to make "gut the love salmon" a common slang term for sex. Spread the word.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I feel worse lying to the guy I hooked up with than I actually do for cheating on my bf
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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