Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I had a dream that I got a gift certificate to a lavish spa from my father. I think dream dad, along with real dad, think I'm gay.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
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