peeing is so easy when youre drunk. you just tell your body to pee and it pees.
shouldn't i get a discount if shes pregnant?
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
This is going to be another afternoon spent getting drunk in the shower, isn't it?
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He made me eat donuts off his dick. donuts, jen. DONUTS.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
I woke up with jello shots in pant pockets so I must've had fun
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
He started yelling "you tha man!" while I was reverse cowgirl
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
Sometimes being bisexual is a curse. Turns out I banged both of her older twin brothers last summer.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
Randomize
