We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
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