Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
i took an adderall last night to write a paper. i ended up watching 7 hours of roseanne and couldn't look away
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
Hey, I can't find my bed frame. Do you know who took it?
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
Last night was the first night with all of the roommates, and what started as a calm night of light drinking got out of hand. There's a girl on my couch wearing only a fanny pack.
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
He's not letting me leave till I cum. I am a hostage to my own vagina
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Randomize
