remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Dude on a beach in sicily and a blonde jesus just smoked us out and then tried to makeout with me I am never leaving this place
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Randomize
