What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
He surprised me with a puppy tail butt plug in his ass and wants me to fuck him
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
I pointed at him and said “there goes mr fuckwad”
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