hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
She was wearing some slutty variation of a toga and giving the entire bus a pep talk on why we should black out tonight...I'M IN LOVE AND I DON'T CARE WHO KNOWS IT!
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
Yesterday I went home with one shoe, today I go home with three. Fucking win.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
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