dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
Fuck me first. Then we can craft and watch Terminator 2.
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
