this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
if i wake up one more time on my porch im gonna start considering myself homeless
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
He SHOWED UP to the party wearing one shoe and a dinosaur hat. He kept lifting up his shirt and asking people to bite his nipple.
So, I'm drinking, and I put my head down in the table. The cat jumped up to check on me, I have a cat sober monitor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
Then while I was crying on his shoulder, he got a boner. Soo. I kinda just hopped on.
My New Years resolution is to not hook up with random guys.
Mine is to not hook up with anyone who has a kid.
Randomize