so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Apparently drunk me was getting hit on and i wasn't into it so i shouted "Stupify" at him like i was fucking harry potter then went to the pizza place next to the bar and punted some guys pizza box out of his hands. :(
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
Just got our of the shower. I'm standing naked in front of my open windows cause fuck my neighbors that's why
im sleeping with a therapist...so you can talk to me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
Randomize