Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
giving him head while hes talking to his fiancee on the phone about inviting me to their wedding.... im invited. should i go or would that be wrong?
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Not complaining, but why is there a Russian chick downstairs making latkes?
It's a strange mix of shame and pride every time I pee at the bar and still see my lipstick on the bathroom wall...
i want to live in a society where a 20 year old can wear pigtails and not get them called handlebars, because i look fucking adorable in them.
You were asking her how her mother would feel if y'all dated, etc. And I was yelling at you your girlfriends name over and over again in between gags and sobs.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Him naked in my bed with a bottle of vodka in one hand, a pipe in the other, and a rose in his mouth.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
It can't be Friday yet, in still getting friend requests of people I don't remember from last weekend
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
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