I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
Everything about him screamed your future.
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
You asked the waitress what the corking fee would be on the Joose you smuggled into the restaurant.
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
She started snoring post sex, so I drunkenly walked 8 miles at 4am to go fishing. Please come pick me up
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
Randomize
