He then proceeded to try to whisper up my nose...
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I tried ok? my penis just doesnt like her as much as my mother does
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Putting the hydrocodone in Pez dispensers. Do you want Speedy Gonzales or Darth Vader?
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
How dare you. Idk what you called me, and neither does google translate, but you better take it back.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
I was like a damn cattle dog, I separated all the sheep, I can wing man for anyone on this campus.
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
I want an apology pizza with SORRY IM A DOUCHE spelled out on it in pepperoni
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
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