Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
He lasted like 30 seconds. With a condom. I just expected more from the president of a frat.
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
I just peed next to my dog in the yard. Unparalleled forms of bonding going on over here.
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
She was humming during sex. After I asked her why, she said it was her sex theme music
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
The fact that I took a nap during my midterm shows exactly how I handle being an adult
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
her idea of a romantic time is a bottle of jager, some Guacamole and chips.
can't go wrong with guac.
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