When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I wishh there was a lost and high section in walmart cause I would be there right now
it was my 21st birthday. took an old mans walker so i could stay till last call. reasonable right?
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
She asked the taxi driver to stop at the Texaco because she had to puke. She did then stumbled into the gas station and bought a 40.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
She came to class yesterday wearing a shirt saying Maybe Partying Will Help. Showed up to class today and puked three times.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
no i'm going to the dr today, he fucking banshee-shrieked in my ear as he was coming and now i can't hear out of it
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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